“I wonder if I’m thinking about Mom more
because I lost my place in the starting
lineup” (67).
Kevin, the main character in Shakespeare
Bats Cleanup, is lamenting the
tragedy of losing his mom and his identity. He makes the connection later in
the story that his loss of his position in the starting lineup could be causing
him to think about the loss of his mom. He uses the poems as a structured way
to address painful memories and feelings. Loss is a strong theme throughout
this novel and Kevin uses his poetry to come to terms with it.
Since Kevin is in bed so much he spends a lot of time thinking about the
past and about his mom (20). He writes “Pantoum for Mom” and it brings up a lot
of memories that are painful for him to remember but writing the poem kept him
from breaking down.
"You know what kept me from leaking
all over the page? Sticking to the rules
about what rhymes with what and how
two lines from one stanza turn into
two lines in the next" (30).
He also
mentions that writing in poem form made his writing better because if he had
just let himself go and wrote about his mom getting sick it would have sounded
like he was wining. “Pantoum for Mom” was quite heartbreaking to read and in the
poem following it you could see that he really struggles with the fact that she
is not with him anymore.
"Well, nobody’ll see this pantoum, but it
means the same thing: You’re a great mom.
Were. You were a great mom" (30).
I think once
he comes to that realization that she is gone and never coming back he begins
to write about what a great mom she was and the poems still show loss but yet
it is more lighthearted and celebrating what he did have instead of what he
doesn’t have now. His poem about Halloween and his mom in a monster suit was
not sad it was humorous and light. He uses a very difficult poem, the sestina,
to remember a fun time he had with his mother.
"Well, it was worth it to remember Mom
in her monster suit at Safeway.
Man, she was fun" (51).
Kevin starts to bring his mom and
baseball together when he writes “Mom’s Car”. He talks about washing his
uniform to look nice, even if he wasn’t going to play. The laundry room is
right next to the garage. He remember sitting in his mom’s car right after she
died (58). I think the realization that he won’t play in the game causes some
pain and then he remembers the death of his mom, another time when he felt a
lot of pain. After sitting on the bench the whole game he is pretty depressed
and writes “Ollie, Ollie, All in Free”. Writing this poem makes him realize
that maybe losing his position made him remember losing something bigger.
"Did losing that little thing make me
remember losing something big, like one
little match can start a whole forest fire" (67)?
After making
this realization things begin to look up for him. He becomes more positive
because I think he realizes that losing his position isn’t a big deal. He can
always get it back. After making this realization he is able to move on and doesn’t
write anymore poems about his mom or depressing poems about losing his position
on the team.
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